Two weeks ago, Cole and I attended our first self-development workshop based on the book the 7 Habits of Highly Successful people, written by Stephen Covey. The workshop was hosted by a local and successful entrepreneur named Dan Roselli who owns a community workspace in uptown Charlotte, named Packard Place. The workshop was free and took place for 3-5 hours each day for three days. We were also generously gifted the “7 Habits” book and workbook. Check out the website here and stay tuned for upcoming events!
On day 1 of the workshop, Dan asked us what we wanted to achieve over the course of the week. My response was clarity and focus because oftentimes I’m juggling so much and feel like I can’t keep my head on straight. I really wanted to learn how to prioritize my time and thankfully that ended up being one of my biggest takeaways from the week. Two other big takeaways were creating a mission statement for my life, and the “emotional bank account”. Pretty cool stuff! I’ll break it down below.
In order to create a mission statement, we really had to narrow down what our core values are, how we enjoy spending our time, and what’s of great importance to us. That’s the condensed version. From there you can draft up a paragraph summarizing that information, and then condense it down even further into a sentence or two. Your mission statement should fit well into all aspects of your life, from career to personal. My mission statement started as “to ignite and inspire positive change in others so that they may live a life of joy, success, whole health, and peace, and live a life in alignment”. I then narrowed that down to “to ignite and inspire positive change in others, by living a life in alignment.” I highly recommend getting the book or workbook so you can work through these ideas as well.
Once we narrowed down our mission statement and began to formulate our ideas, we began to take a closer look at our roles in life. So what hats do you wear in your daily life? Some examples are mother, wife, friend, grandparent, chef, waitress, neighbor, father, sister, etc. It is recommended that you choose up to 7 priority roles to focus on. My roles ended up being mother, wife, actress, healthy lifestyle influencer/content creator, Beautycounter consultant, self, and family member/friend. On a weekly basis, these are the roles that I am trying to prioritize in my life, however each week the order of importance in each role might change.
The concept of breaking my time and focus up into 7 dedicated roles was a huge lightbulb moment for me. I tend to want to give 110% in each given role at one time, and that is not realistic or possible. Now I can plan out my week in accordance to these roles, and here is a breakdown of how I do it:
1. I think about and write down my overall intention for each of my roles in my calendar. For example, in my “mother” role for the week, I intend on being present with my children and spending a few hours of quality time with them on their day off from school. As a “wife” this week I intend on being a good listener while Cole is traveling on business, and I want to dedicate one night to him without distractions. I continue you on with some overall weekly intentions for the remainder of my roles.
2. Once that generalized list is done, I start breaking down my week and blocking out time for each of the specific goals I have for each role. For example, Monday, 1pm: take girls to Meg Art to paint pottery, Friday 8pm: put the phone away and watch This Is Us with Cole, etc.
Side note: I really enjoy keeping and writing in a personal calendar and the one that I use is called the Day Designer. I purchase it every year from Target and will link it here. If you aren’t into paper planning, you can type all of this into a calendar app of choice on your phone or computer.
Simpler than it seemed, right? Once you have an outline for your week you can arrange as needed day by day, knowing what takes priority and what does not. Whatever you do, write it down or type it in, otherwise, your ideas are more likely to get lost and never come to fruition once the week gets going.
The last takeaway that I mentioned above is called “the emotional bank account.” This metaphor represents the idea that our mind is a bank account and people can either make a “deposit” and create good emotional connections with you or make a “withdrawal” and leave you with negative feelings or emotions. For example, if someone doesn’t keep their word, or is flaky or has a bad attitude, that more than likely will negatively impact you and your relationship. On the contrary, if someone keeps their promises, spends quality time with you, or treats you with love and respect, they are more than likely making some valuable “emotional deposits” that will impact your relationship in a great way. This made me think about my actions or inactions and how they might be affecting each of my relationships. I found it all very interesting.
Overall, we learned so much at this workshop and it was really nice that Cole and I got to enjoy it together. I’m mildly obsessed with self-development and personal growth and have been talking about it for years. I’m pretty sure Cole has rolled his eyes at me from time to time. LOL! However, he arranged for us to go to this workshop on his own accord and it proves a point that I have made to coaching clients and friends often: focus on improving yourself and the quality of your own life and those around you will rise to the occasion!